The secular artist Buju Banton said in one of his songs “I Wanna be loved, not for who you think I am,
nor what you want me to be, could you love me for me?”.

Growing up in a Caribbean home with
unsaved parents that song was always on the playlist. However, if I examine the lyrics carefully it begs the question, should we search for a love that accepts us for just simply being who we are? Absolutely
we should seek a connection that allows us to let our guards down and be our true selves, revealing our quirks, kinks, fears, and dreams.

Nevertheless, while the lyrics of the song convey a true sentiment I
must ask, is that all we should desire from love?
Buju wants a love that displays acceptance but is that all love has to offer? Is acceptance the pinnacle of love? I don’t think so. There needs to be more accompanied with love. I truly believe genuine love forces
change more than it does acceptance. I know it may be a challenging concept to wrap one’s mind around but if love does not foster healthy change, I might question whether it is love at all. Healthy love
should cause our ill-tempered mannerism to change, selfishness to diminish, it matures us with every disagreement handled and resolved properly, refines our character, and grounds us.

Jesus said in Matthew 22 verse 34-40 that we shall love the Lord our God with all our heart, and with all our soul, and with all our mind; furthermore, that we shall love our neighbor as ourselves. These two
principles, the love for God and the love for others are the real motivators behind the commandments.

Love fosters selfless action. It is the love we have for others that allows us to get rid of hatred, jealousy, envy and pride. Love is our motivator to good deeds. Love calls for action while it includes acceptance to
a certain degree. Like Buju I want to be loved for who I am but I don’t want a love that leaves me as I am. I want a love that propels me to good deeds. I want a love that develops patience in me, a love that
makes me count to ten before responding in efforts to avoid saying something disrespectful.

Of a truth, love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth (1 Corinthians 13:4-7). This is the love I want. Real love!